Laugh Dammit...You'll feel better
Group admin:Linda Mann
Jack Black
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Latest Activity: Sep 1, 2023
Started by Carmen Elsa Irarragorri Wyland Apr 14, 2020. 0 Replies 1 Like
New government programs to help retired Americans Due to the current upset situation caused by the Corona Virus in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50…Continue
Started by Karen Black. Last reply by Linda M. Jun 24, 2019. 1 Reply 1 Like
I was looking at something totally unrelated to this online (I can't remember what it was) when I stumbled over this stuff. It amused me so I thought I would share it here. NONE of this is my own…Continue
Started by Carmen Elsa Irarragorri Wyland Aug 1, 2018. 0 Replies 0 Likes
A policeman was interrogating 3 guys who were training to become detectives.To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first guys a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it."This is…Continue
Started by Carmen Elsa Irarragorri Wyland. Last reply by Linda M. Jul 30, 2018. 2 Replies 1 Like
A man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant, and while sitting at his regular table, he notices a gorgeous woman sitting at a table nearby all alone. He calls the waiter over and asks for their most…Continue
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I love those, Minque!
It is all very funny!
A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?”
The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound.
The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”
The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way.
Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery.
The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.
The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”
The man says, “All right, all right. I’m *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?”
The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.”
The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.”
The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.”
The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.”
The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?”
The monks give him the key, and he opens the door.
Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone.
The man demands the key to the stone door.
The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby.
He demands another key from the monks, who provide it.
Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire.
So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst.
Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.”
The man is relieved to no end.
He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.
But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk
BWAHAHAHAHAH
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind
him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger,
fries and a coke," and turns to The ostrich, "What's yours?" "I'll have the
same," says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will
Be $9.40 please" The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact
change for payment.
The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man
Says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke." The ostrich says, "I'll have the
same." Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.
This becomes routine until the two enter again. "The usual?" asks
the waitress.
"No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato
and a salad," says the man. "Same," says the ostrich.
Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be
$32.62." Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and
Places it on the table.
The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse
me, Sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your
pocket every time?"
"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic
and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me
two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I
would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would
always be there."
"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would ask for
a Million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for
as long as you live!"
"That's right..Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the
exact money is always there," says the man.
The waitress asks, "What's with the ostrich?"
The man sighs, pauses and answers, "My second wish was for a tall
chick with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say.."
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