I found this art therapy exercise on YouTube via a channel called "IABET- Consciousness Through Art." In combination with my personal therapist I started creating a series of similar art using this or similar methods.
You can locate the video here: youtu.be/TcGPc80f2VM
I attempted this in the spring when I had been struggling a great deal with my submissive identity and its seeming incongruency with certain core spiritual values and decided to try and use this method to understand both how I felt about and interpreted submission, as well as what I felt a submissive was to me. This was the end result of my little jerry-rigging experiment. Once again it was very awkward, but after completing this piece I felt relieved and comforted in a way I hadn't for a very long time. I'm also going to post one for submissive/submission.
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Hi, do you have a name?
- You may call me Jade.
...
- Names have power. I have many names. Some names are given or earned, others are created or made, and still more are chosen or found. I am Jade.
Okay Jade, why have you come to me?
- To make you whole again. To complete the circle.
Is there anything you think I should know?
- Stones throw...
You mean, "a stones throw away?"
- Amongst other things...
Do you have anything to say?
- I speak without words, words are my lowest form of communication. Find me in the unbroken and unspoken.
Alright... to be honest I'm not sure what I'm supposed to ask you.
- Why have you called me? Why have you come here?
Um... Therapy? I've been feeling disconnected and ashamed of you lately. I wanted to understand why and heal it.
- submission is a path of growing, the pain is to be expected. Keep growing.
Is that all?
- discard the unnatural. I cannot be contained. You cannot be contained. Except, in him. You need to learn the meaning of a vessel.
I feel like I understand what you mean...
- Of course you do. [ Vague feeling of kindness] Complete the circle.
What circle?
- All things begin where they end. The growing turns the circle. The knowing closes the circle.
That, I don't think I understand.
- That's why you keep growing.
Is there anything you need, to keep growing?
- Solace, Joy, Validation, Peace, Strength, Light.
Oh, is that all?
- That's an unbecoming tone.
Sorry.
- Forgiven.
Is there anything you want?
- Yes. Many things.
What are they?
- Purpose. They are purpose. And Meaning. They are both, together.
Uh...Okay, so I guess I should ask you why I'm ashamed of you?
- Because I cannot be contained. Containment makes you easy to control by others, only the worthy can control me. They are not worthy. You fear the walls.
So I'm not ashamed, I'm afraid?
- That is correct.
Of them not being worthy? It's not about my worth?
- Yes. You have always been worthy, you just haven't accepted that yet. You are looking in the wrong place for growth.
Alright, I have a specific question... Is that okay?
- Of course.
What does submission mean to you?
- Depth. Sacrifice. Vulnerability. Worship. Devotion. Integrity. Strength. Persistence. Rumination.
I'm suddenly very tired...may I ask more questions tomorrow?
- Always.
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I struggled so much with this one that I asked my therapist what she thought and we processed this piece together (she is a KAP). She suggested that instead of trying to understand the cryptic "conversation" that I should actually just look at what is being said and expressed without words, just like "Jade" informed me. So we spent a lot of the session interpreting what I thought or felt each aspect of the drawing represented or meant to me. Feel free to offer your own interpretations but please be respectful.
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