In fact, unless you have the compassion, empathy, heart and mind of a saint, as the site grows I can pretty much guarantee it.

There will be those people here. Those people you try so desperately to avoid. Those people that grate on your nerves. Those people that believe in *that* stuff, you know, maybe it's the scary stuff, or maybe it's fluffy bunny stuff. Maybe it's not what they believe, but how they shove it down your throat. Or so it seems. Or maybe it's that they just seem to know it all, and they're SO wrong. You know THOSE people.

Well guess what, we're all one of those people. All of us come off the wrong way to someone sometime. Yeah, we might whine in our heads, but we know better. I'm really a NICE person, a SMART person, a RIGHT person. My intentions are all in the right place. Well guess what, we're all one of those people too.

Ayup.

There will be people here that will use words you don't like, and find offensive.

There will be people here that have beliefs and practices, that you find disturbing, upsetting, or maybe silly, stupid, or trivial. All of us, will have SOME negative assumptions about someone on this site.

Bottom line, we are all who we are.

If we want the freedom to be ourselves, we must extend that freedom to others.

If we want to be respected for our own choices, faiths, ideas, beliefs, we have to extend it to others.

What then to do with those individuals that rub many people the wrong way? Who are more extreme on the edge of a more out there belief, or method of expressing themselves that they disrupt a lot of people a lot of the time. I'm not sure honestly how I will deal with individuals that may really push this sites members buttons.

My first line of approach is trying to work toward an inclusive solution. Bring resolution and positive change without excluding someone. I would like to make removing someone from this site a really last resort.

There are people who thrive on conflict, and conflict is also often a positive part of people who are going through periods of growth and change. Overcoming conflicts. Learning how to resolve conflict. As well as learning how to communicate with others effectively and to co-operate with others, is one of the most meaningful things we can do actually in terms of our self growth and development.

You can use conflict with others on this site as catalysts for positive growth and change, for yourself, and for others. You can choose to try to change what you can change, not that other person, but yourself. You can choose to try to expand your empathy and compassion. You can make an effort to try harder to understand why that other person is who they are, believes what they believe, and feels how they feel, or expresses themselves how they do. All of us have baggage, history, triggers, brainwashing, etc, to overcome. All of us. We are all the walking wounded. If you want a less judgemental more compassionate world. WE have to co-create it.

We can start co-creating it here.

Defuse conflict, keep conflict to places where people who want to embrace it only can, and not impose our conflict onto others who do not want to be a part of it. Recognize trolling behaviours and people who feed on negative energy, or are addicted, literally to the adrenaline rush of the 'fight' or flight response, and just like a good fight (yup, some do, let them fight with others that like to do battle, and if your the pacifist type like me, learn to walk away). I have a tendency as a pacifist to want to repress or smooth over conflict, perhaps more than is ultimately healthy. Really, who gets to decide? and maybe what is healthy for one person isn't the same for another...

I know you're all intelligent enough to really get what I'm saying here.

Conflict will happen, be ready for it, focus not on what I can do as a site owner to fix it for you, or what the other person has to do to stop bothering you, and focus on the only change that really matters, the one you can bring with you off site and everywhere you go. Learn your own personal way of dealing with it, create strategies and plans for self for sharing spiritual space with a diverse group of people.

This place will have a lot of freedom, for many people, that may feel like a lack of 'security', that lack of security, is not coming from the site, that feeling of insecurity, is a feeling, and it comes from within you, and only you, can address it. You can avoid it, or you can understand it, and control it, rather than letting it control you.

Leila

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I myself don't follow anything but I do read the Word.  Its all about deprogramming your mind and staying in your heart.  When you do that stepping on ants in a jungle doesn't really matter.  In mind we all have views but its about allowig each individual to have their own view.  The common thread is the spirirt and that justs simply Love.  So if your not attached to someone's thinking even if it doesn't match your own but can just be you've won the battle. If you get into mental combat with another just disengage, let them be and you be also.  Now and then you pick up something of use and sometimes you don't.  We all have different talents and exchange when neccessary.

"The common thread is Spirit and that's simply Love"

A=

Thank you!

Triple Wow and Pow! I truly love that well put and to the point and very long winded statement. I  wouldn't have spared any space or better words spoken and with such focus on such a non PC topic, but again we are a non PC group of folk. I think you covered everything pretty much. A scrumptious and electrical hug goes to you Leila. Thank you, TKB

Thank you Leila, for making this all possible and what you have done for everyone deserves so much respect. You are an example to all :)

I often come here to meditate on your words of wisdom and read something this morning which reminded me of you:

"Thus, the Master is content

to serve as an example

and not to impose her will.

She is pointed, but doesn't pierce.

Straightforward, but supple.

Radiant, but easy on the eyes.

The whole world is grateful to her.

Because she competes with no-one;

no-one can compete with her."

~Lao Tzu

No worries.  Nothing offends me and though I may find people I do not agree with, there is never anyone I don't like.  All are beautiful pieces of the Divine symphony. 

In this song of dissonance in which we all are part
Many rhythms which sound from many beating hearts
Notes without harmony clashing so loud
We ask for one melody to rise above the crowd
Then follow the harmonies, one note at a time
Until we resound with a frequency Divine
The breath of our many lives blowing strong
To play the trumpets as we all sing along
Then follow the strings as they sound a serenade
Complimenting the sweet reeds whisper that's played
And with one composition of love in our souls
We harmonize and so this symphony unfolds
At last as we come together as one
We see that this song of Unity is done
This is the prayer we seek to become
Hand in hand, heart to heart, we all become one.

Inspired, and well expressed. Very wise

are people still replying too this post like a year later, wow talk about chinese super whispersBody Language website

I just saw it. Ive not been on here in a long while.

I do agree with you

keep em in line :)

I try to be the same person here that I am in real life. I'm so far from perfect that I can't even see perfect on the horizon, but everything I do I do with other people in mind. While it may be much easier to choose your words carefully in this medium, people don't always realize what they are saying can truly be hurtful. Then, of course, there are those that you yourself described. Those that are so empty, so lost in their own lives and are so desperately searching for some sort of purpose that they will create something to fight for, even if it makes no sense.

I'm anything but passive, but I will choose my battles carefully. I also know to walk away when a disagreement has devolved into a "I can hurt you more" contest. 

I suppose in my own wordy way I'm saying " Well said, Leila. I agree whole-heartedly. (and I really should post here more often. heh)"

P.S. Dangel, exactly how do these people expect you to act? I'm not Wiccan by any stretch, but a huge portion of my friends are practicing ones, and unless they walked up to you and said " Hiya! I'm Wiccan!" you would never know. 

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